Lately I’ve been in a groove that has me up before the sun most days. Though I try resist the impulse to pick up my phone, this morning I opened Instagram at 4 a.m. and saw Gloria Steinem’s account — a somber post that she died peacefully overnight at age 92. It took several hours before the media started reporting on it, and in those quiet moments, I reflected on the myriad ways her words and deeds have impacted the world we inhabit and altered my own world view.
As Contrarian readers may know, I am also proudly part of the team at Ms. Magazine — one of Gloria’s many legacies, and which still thrives as an essential feminist news and storytelling hub today. Her words, her wisdom, her exclamations of “fan-fucking-tastic,” even her very physical appearance — honey hair, ever-cool aviators, low-slung belts — swirl in my psyche every day.
By mid-morning, my social media feed had exploded into a wall of tributes — photos, anecdotes, news clips. I surely knew how much she meant to women of all ages — it seems everyone can quote a pithy on-the-mark phrase attributed to Gloria Steinem — but what I found so riveting was how many have an intimate firsthand interaction to recount, a prized selfie to share, a sense of real connection and meaning when it comes to Gloria. My Ms. colleague Roxy Szal refers to her as the “people’s feminist” — a pairing of words that may seem simply strung together, but represent a depth of generosity, compassion, savvy, and social intelligence and skill that is rare.
I scrolled my phone to soak up the photos that mark my own journey knowing Gloria. It is my honor to share them with The Contrarian.
March 2014: At the Paley Media Center’s “Free to Be … You and Me at 40” event. I grew up on the record album, read the book, and sang the songs to my own kids. At the time, I was mid-career and angtsy about being at a crossroads. I met Gloria at a meet-and-greet and shared with her a story about my son: When he was eight years old, I’d overheard him tell a group of boys he was a feminist; when one of them asked, “What’s a feminist?” he responded coolly, “You know, people like my mom and me. People who stand up for women’s rights.” She smiled and said, “You know, you really should write about that.” I never did (until right now!), but by June of that year, I published my first ever op-ed. It was about sexist school dress codes and wound up inspiring a BBC mini-doc; here is an archived local news clip about how it spurred my kids’ school district to improve their policy. Suffice to say, thanks to Gloria’s encouragement, I was hooked on public writing as a tool for making change.
September 2015: This was the year I entered the orbit of menstrual advocacy, an issue that redirected the entire trajectory of my career and my life. I had just returned from traveling India to interview innovators and entrepreneurs tackling access to period products and partnered with then-NYT columnist Nick Kristof to write about it. I knew in my bones Gloria was the one person with whom I most wanted to discuss this experience, so I took a chance and sent a cold email. Imagine my surprise when I received her response: an invitation to come to her home simply to chat. That conversation ignited my imagination and my confidence to levels I didn’t even know I was capable of. She did that.
October 2017: I published my first book, Periods Gone Public, and Gloria wrote the cover blurb, calling it “the beginning of liberation for us all.” These photos were actually taken a few years later, at a dinner party shortly after pandemic lockdowns had lifted and one of the first in-person interactions that I’d had. Talk about pressure! I always think my smile looks like I’d forgotten how to be social. My joy being in her presence was so real. (Dolores Huerta was at the same party. Icons.)
December 2018: Gloria: A Life ran Off-Broadway and featured real-time talking circles with the audience. I was honored she asked me to lead one and got such a thrill out of meeting the cast who portrayed her with richness and depth.
August 2023: In advance of the publication of 50 Years of Ms., an anthology of the magazine’s pathbreaking reporting since its launch by Gloria and others, I had the opportunity to interview her about the book. As she signed my copy, I knelt close by. Being at eye level with her was always empowering and enlightening (and fun).
September 2023: At the book launch, with fellow Ms. founders and today’s team, including Kathy Spillar, Michele Bratcher Goodwin, and Carol Jenkins.
And a bonus shot: I have no idea where this was taken, but it is my husband joining me to meet her after an event. Gloria always was game to shout out the good men. I loved this moment.
I know there are countless others like me who have stories to tell about time spent with Gloria and how she made them feel, how she enabled them to see everything — and especially themselves — with more clarity, grace, and ferocity. What a fan-fucking-tastic legacy. Rest in power, Gloria Steinem. We’re all clutching that torch you lit so brightly and will carry it into boldly the future.
Jennifer Weiss-Wolf is executive director of the Birnbaum Women’s Leadership Center at NYU School of Law. She also leads strategy and partnerships at Ms. Magazine.
Why does death keep coming for the wrong people? This loss is painful. May she rest in power. May her memory be a blessing to all.